Failure is Inevitable, Success is a Choice

How many effective leaders do you believe have failed?

Often when we see highly effective leaders, we may believe they have it all figured out. We might even believe they are just naturally excellent, and while we may aspire to be like them when we grow up, when we’re in a season of failing, it is easy to allow doubt to creep into our minds.

Let’s go ahead and set the record straight. Success is NOT the opposite of failure. If you believe it is, then I want you to stop and I want you to let that go. No seriously, commit to accepting success is not the opposite of failure right now.

The definition of failure according to a quick Google search is “The condition or fact of being insufficient or falling short.”

I won’t disagree, the above definition does in fact mean you did not succeed. You fell short or did not achieve your desired outcome. But here is the cool thing, falling short is not a definitive ending. In case you’re still not convinced, let me give you a visual. Did you have a bike as a child? I did, and I can remember on more than one occasion wrecking that bike. After each wreck, after each time I fell, I got back up, I dusted myself off and I got back on my bike. I can promise you; every single successful leader has failed or fallen short. They have had goals they did not reach; they have made some poor decisions, they have disappointed others, but the difference is that natural born leaders do not allow a failure to stop them.

Now that we know what failure is (and isn’t), let’s look at what success is. From the good book of Miriam Webster, success is defined as the “degree or measure of succeeding.” So, let’s talk about that. Everyone who attended elementary school is aware a degree (think temperatures, angles, etc.) or a measure of anything is variable. Meaning it moves. It can increase or decrease, but the exciting news here is that success is movable!!

If you are in a season of life where you feel like you’ve failed, it is time to get up and dust yourself off. It is time for you to acknowledge, you control your success. You may not control all the variables that are causing you pain, but you DO control the degree in which you accept this failure.

You, and only you, control whether you take failure personally and allow it to paralyze you or if you will use it as a learning experience. Remember those bike crashes I mentioned earlier? Did you learn something from them? Personally, I did! I learned to watch for loose gravel or pebbles when going fast around turns, a lesson learned 35 years ago that was committed to memory forever.

Friends, failure is not the opposite of success. Failures should be nothing more than tools in our toolbox. Failure is necessary for growth. Success is simply measured by your response to failure and highly effective leaders learn to watch for those loose pebbles and avoid them in the future, so as not to make the same mistake twice.